The first week of summer vacation

I got over the first week of summer vacation.

During this week, I took my son to his alumni meeting at the kindergarten where he graduated, treated my husband's colleagues at home with lovely conversation and saw son's teacher at the elementary school as a regular meeting. Above all, I have made all the meals by myself with fresh stuff.

Here I want to say "well done!" for myself.

In addition to LOVE

Following the finding of love, I have noticed other concepts which I don't use daily. For example, people in other countries say "proud of you/me" in their conversations, but I haven't used it. "Proud" is also too strong word, the same as "love" for me. If someone says "I'm proud of you" in daily conversation, I would think I don't deserve the word. I don't know when is a suitable situation for using the word.

I had looked for the meaning of my life until recently and the meaning is applause from others. After I have known it's not my happiness, I give the word, "well done"/"I did it" to myself frequently. So, now I try to move forward to the next step and try to give the word "I'm proud of myself" if it's only once a week. 

I'm looking forward to seeing the effects of those two words, "LOVE" and "PROUD OF MYSELF". 

Practice of LOVE

I think Japanese people are not familiar with love. I don't use the word, love, in my daily life and I also have not received the word from others. If someone says to me "I love you", I must be confused. They should be puzzled by the word if I say it to my friends and might ask me "what's happened on you". Love has too much impact on our society.

I talked about this topic with my friend who is named S tentatively. Since S is American, familiar with the word. He gave me the explanation of the way to use it. "I use it all around. I love cameras, I love my dog, I love my wife, I love friends, and of course I love you!" I answered after hearing it. "It's too much for me. Love is very strong emotion." 

It's hard to say "love you" just right now, but on the other hand, I thought it's good behavior to connect with each other. I know it's not fit with our culture and social system. So, how can I start to try it with my son or my close friends? And let's see the effects of love. 

At the end of the conversation with S, I tried to say "Bye-bye. Love you." I felt so good while at the same time was extremely embarrassed. I need practice to say it naturally.

The fear for summer vacation

I'm bracing for the summer vacation.

My son's summer vacation will start the day after tomorrow. So, I'm afraid of making every meal. I have kept some fish, meat and vegetables in my fridge for making them, but I still feel the preparations are not enough.

In the U.S. dramas, people buy meals at restaurants or order pizzas frequentry. Of course, I can do the same like them, but it's not so cheap here in Japan. In addition, there are no Trader joe's/Whole foods*1 in Japan and it's hard to find frozen foods made with organic ingredients. So I have to make meals by myself if I want to eat something trustworthy and low-cost.

How can I enjoy this task? I need replicators*2 to solve this problem. 

*1 Both of them are supermarkets in the U.S. which deliver various organic foods.
*2 A machine for creating meals in the Sci-Fi drama, StarTrek.

The reason why I write blog in English

I'm not a native speaker of English. So, why am I writing this blog in English?

There are many reasons for it. The first reason is friends. I want to tell my personal stories to my friends who are living in foreign countries. The second one is for my learning. I want to use it more freely and properly. The third one is just fun. The English is the second language for me. When I write it, I feel it's like a secret code. English and Japanese which is my mother language, have huge distance in linguistics speaking. The concepts of each word, order of words, sounds...nothing similarity between these two languages. To write sentences in English is making a puzzle with code. And in the end, if I choose Japanese for this blog, I can not say any excuses for my mistake. It's kind of a pressure. 

So, please don't care if my grammar is wrong. I'm in the middle of training and should improve at my own pace. 

I want to write, seriously

I like to write something. Probably, I have liked it since I was a child. I write snail mails, emails and messages to my friends living in foreign countries. In addition, I have started to post podcasts since January of this year.

By writing text, I figure myself out and clear my mind, then move forward. I believe the effect of writing for changing myself. 

In this blog, I would write a tiny story which is too trivial for the podcast, for letters to friends. Those are almost soliloquy. It's 2021 and to start a blog might not be trendy. But now I'm happy to start here if it's an ordinary way to express myself.