I have the behavior which I want to feel superiority complex to others. When I meet people at the first time, I talk a lot to keep my position higher than them. When I attend meetings, I say my opinions to appeal my presence. I had tried to throw this behavior away for a year but it wasn't easy for me.
The behavior comes from my loneliness. My parents were misanthrope and I probably took over the atmosphere. So I was difficult to participate the circle of friends since I was in the kindergarten. I was easy to isolate from their without any reason. They might be feel the atmosphere of mine. So I had tried to get attentions from them by showing my ability, such as saying opinions or telling something rare experiences I have. I had thought I have to keep superiority complex for avoiding loneliness. I was afraid of losing attention from others and of being alone.
One day, I met the person at the meditation circle which I participate regularly. Her life was so unique and special, I thought. After I knew about her life history, I thought that I have nothing special compared with hers. It was impossible to feel superiority complex to her.
I finally realized what should I do for my future. If I always want to feel superiority complex to others, it's impossible. People live in various situation and have various ability. I'm no match for all the people with various criteria. In that case, the only the way is to pursue my uniqueness and to be more who I am. It's not necessary to compare with other's stuff and to have superiority complex to others. I'm just who I am.